challenged?
In first grade I was diagnosed ADD and emotionally challenged. I should scan the paperwork for a post header. I really didn’t know about it until my early adult hood. The fact is though, it takes some real living in order to understand what it means to be “emotionally challenged”.
I kinda disdain the term actually; it seems insulting to my faculty as a human being; it implies that I was made “wrong” from the beginning. I’m not sure if it’s a developmental problem or just a learning disability, but the fact is I do have trouble relating to others. I’m often insulting, crass, tactless, and just generally uncouth; the only way I even know this is from analyzing the reactions of others around me. I aspire to be a musician, but it’s been a hard road having to make the heart I have to use to be my muse for my art; at least I don’t have to settle for the one I was born with.
But without being so pretentious, I do experience emotions, I just don’t experience them in the way we seem to be acustomed to them being presented. I like to think of the way I experience passion, and hate, and all of that as the way we individually see colors, and it just so happens my frequency assignments are very different from others. My only worry so to speak is that I question if a person who experiences emotions so different from others can succeed in what I have a passion for. Well, Beck certainly made it.
Tags: emotional issues, inspiration, Music